Saturday, July 13, 2013

A Word to Old Friends

We humans, even those of us who enjoy periods of solitude, are social creatures.  Once we learn to communicate, we begin to establish relationships with other humans, first with our family members and then with a life-long chain of friends.  Unfortunately, while we generally retain a close connection with relatives, we tend to discard friendships as we move through the stages of our life.

Losing touch is often the result of moving to other cities, developing new social relationships and focusing on the new priorities in our life (children, career and personal interests).  Though we may retain loose contacts with old friends, primarily via holiday cards or group emails, meaningful correspondence is often lacking.  Recognizing that the course of our life is significantly influenced by our relationships, most of those old friends affected our life choices and were a source of inspiration in some way or another; it is unfortunate that their role, however minor, is often never acknowledged.

Yet, there seems to be a social taboo about reconnecting with old friends.  Some suggest that we are escaping to our past or invading the privacy of those we contact.  While these points have some validity when it comes to past lovers (a potentially dangerous and painful exercise), they seem to be convenient excuses for those too busy to rekindle old friendships.  Being remembered and being acknowledged for one's importance in the lives of others are key to our emotional health and, by contacting past friends, we pass along that support.  Too often, such sentiments are expressed only to their family members, posthumously.